5 WEIRD, CRAZY AND JUST WTF JAPANESE SEX TOYS
Thinking about spicing up your sex life with a kinky gadget? Or maybe something to help you out when you're alone with your best bud, Ol' righty (or lefty). Put those normal and boring fleshlights away and check out some weird Japanese sex toys that are on a whole other level! Pocket pussies modeled after Japanese AV models, ultra silent vibrators which you can slip in your woman’s panties, pivotable high-quality sex dolls, giant alien cocks, you name it. The west definitely looks toward Japan when it comes to sex toys in terms of quality, eroticism and 'only-in-Japan' hentai ingenuity. You can definitely count on a whole lot of weirdness, ridiculousness, and whatthefuckery. Here are our current top 5 popular, weird and crazy Japanese sex toys that we handpicked ourselves to help you get your freak on! (Or have a good laugh at).
WEIRD JAPANESE SEX TOYS FILE 1: THE ORBE
Say hello to the ORBE 03. At a glance, it looks like a worm from outer space. On a second glance, it still looks like a worm from outer space but vomiting red crinkle fries. When I first saw this, I immediately thought of Ore Ida’s crinkle fries I ate when I was a lad. I’m not too sure who thought of the idea, but in a way, it does have some kind of genius to it. While they look slightly dangerous looking, these fries are soft, elastic, and unbeknownst to the viewer, they are very well capable of inducing pleasure. These fries imitate the feeling of a 'live' pussy and conform to your knob in the most tantalizing way. You just get sucked in! Priced at ¥1,350, and rated at 3.29 stars, I’d definitely get this weird Japanese sex toy just for funsies.
WEIRD JAPANESE SEX TOYS FILE 2: GEKI-FERA VACUUM
While there are thousands of themed masturbation supporters, this one wins in the creepy category of mouth-shaped sex toys. No eyes, no face. Just lips, mouth, throat, and sometimes nose included. I’m not especially fond of these Japanese sex toys but I just had to mention it. This one especially, compared to ORBE 03, looks like a worm from outer space with teeth that wants to bite your cock off. Although incredibly fucking creepy and hazardous-looking, the Geki-Fera Vacuum has some good points. 1. It comes with lube, and 2. It’s a vacuum style, and 3. The detail is amazing. This one especially detailed, with mouth and esophageal linings modeled after Japanese AV actress AIKA making her blowjob “O” face. Ramming your knob into this toy would be just as if AIKA was giving you a blowjob in your bedroom! She’s actually really cute too, but this weird Japanese sex toy doesn’t give her beauty justice. You can purchase this crazy toy at $32USD.
WEIRD JAPANESE SEX TOYS FILE 3: ERO(TIC) MASK
This 140mm x 35mm strap-on dildo is unlike any other. As you can see, it is strappable on your chin like a superhero depicted on the item box, or on your forehead, like the sexual deviant unicorn you are. The item is quite simple: A dildo affixed to a strong latex strap which you can mount. If you have too many holes to deal with at one time, you can now use your chin to pleasure your lady (or ladies). It would be like growing an extra penis! Unfortunately, because of this item's overly unique design, it has been discontinued on many websites. But luckily! This crazy Japanese sex toy can be found on the Kanojo Toys website for $57USD.
WEIRD JAPANESE SEX TOYS FILE 4: SALARY MAN UNDIES
This one is not for guys (or girls for the matter) and most likely just for shits and giggles. While not really a sex toy either, it is a sex fetish commodity. And yes, they are a pair of freshly worn men's underwear. I speculate that these pair of undies were definitely worn in the summer. Sweat and piss stains included. If you’ve already heard about used women’s panties being sold in vending machines, you’ve heard right. You can normally purchase them at many sex shops and online stores in Japan. However, they normally come with a picture of the model who soiled them previous to sale date to give the buyer a sexy visual image. These, on the other hand, have none which is why this set priced at $37USD is a little outrageous! But I guess that without a picture, the buyer could relish the mind's ability of pure imagination. Now, what kind of person comes to mind when you think about piss stained tighty whiteys?
WEIRD JAPANESE SEX TOYS FILE 5: PLUSH SEX DOLL
This is Nene. A sexy pink dog with alluring orange and blue eyes. She has bite-sized oppai (boobs) just grabbable by two fingers, and of course, a hole for insertion which is 16cm deep. More dimensions are shown on the website, but more importantly, she is soft and huggable. Other charm points include 360-degree pivotable head, arms, and legs. You can put her into any position you desire. You can also make slight adjustments to her tail if you’d like as well. Don’t want that tail getting in the way of happy time, do we! If you’re particularly into anime, having sex with plush dolls, or you’d like to experience what it’s like fucking an animal, which is not really an animal, I’d definitely recommend this. Honestly, I was completely lost for words with this one. Thus, I can only say “what the fuck”, and promote this weird Japanese sex toy. It’s not as expensive as other sex dolls, but it is worth a pretty penny at ¥45,000 or around $400USD. Surprisingly, unlike the other toys we reviewed, this is still a continued product. There really must be a demand! I’m just not sure if this is considered as beastiality or just fucking insane. Oh my god...
MOVING ON!
There you have it! 5 weird, crazy and just WTF Japanese sex toys. As you can see, their quality, design, and concepts are out of this world. I really do wonder about how these crazy Japanese sex toys came about. But I have to take my hat off once again to the insane but brilliant minds of Japanese sex toy creators. They have no limits! If these Japanese sex toys were too crazy for your liking, here is a top 100 sex toy ranking based on popularity geared for the more normal audiences. Take a look at them here. Nevertheless, whether used for laughs or actually making things interesting in the bedroom, Japanese sex toys can definitely make awesome gifts. Imagine giving the worm from outer space ORBE to a friend for a birthday present. Could be a nasty OR welcomed gift really. Check out Kanojo Toys below for more awesome or weird Japanese sex toys!
